BEST PERFORMANCE BY JOHN GOODMAN EVER!!!

Yeah, so i dance when i eat.

It’s 7:41 am. Daylight savings time has got my mind in a twist. I have this thing where sometimes I’m totally not responsible for my actions when I wake up, like this morning -I just woke up at the laundromat. I’ve got Tegan and Sara in my ears, laundry in the washer, and i’m sitting by the old Frogger game.

So I ask myself –

Why the hell are you doing laundry before you’ve even watched Roseanne?? Harvey AKA personality #2.

I woke up confused because of the whole daylight scavings thing so apparently I went back to bed and Harvey started his day.

So just now when I – or Harvey – had breakfast, two kids and their mom walked into the donut shop. They were a cute family, the mom couldn’t park for crap but I forgave her. Anyway, as I noticed I was dancing while eat and stopped (yes I do that sometimes. And if it’s really good I sing too.) I noticed this cute little family was a spitting image of te pictures I’ve seen of my mom, brother, and sister from the 70’s. The brother had short red hair, the sister long blonde hair, and the mom straight brown hair.

That totally sparked an interdimensional cunundrum in my poor little brain, I think I had a string theory moment. What universe did I wake up in? Is this 2009? Where am I? Is my efing laundry done yet?

Mommy?

So I had to leave. Now I sit by the frogger game drinking some of the worst coffee ever poured. About to miss Roseanne. It’s gonna be a great day.

I think the two Hispanic ladies here are washing clothes for their entire commune. When I put my clothes in the dryer they both gave me odd looks which I’m used to, but it was like I tresses on their property.

I just noticed I picked a dryer right in the midst of the 13 dryers they were using. No joke. 13 of them. They can’t be Mormons though, they’re too brown. I can just picture their hoard of children scurrying around the house like cckroaches.

Hold on – yup, she just dropped another one. It a gurl! Probably a pregnant one at that. The other woman here with her just picked it up, cleaned it off, showed it to it’s momma then took her out to the car as the new mother finished loading the dryer.

The Floor Plan According to Roseanne

I guess from many of my posts you would think that I’m obsessed with Roseanne. And yes, that may be a little bit true. Roseanne is the one show that after several decades of being on television I can still sit down and watch no matter what time of day or season.

There’s one thing however that’s always bugged me about the show – the house’s floor plan. Now I’m not an architect, engineer, draftsman or person of any real education concerning blue prints, etc but I’ve always been fascinated by floor plans. When I was a kid my dad would draw house plans for people and I’d sit on the floor next to him and draw floor plans for the loft my Ken Doll and his boyfriend from North Korea that he met on the internet would move into when gay marriage was legalized…

Yeah as a kid I was totally gay. GAY GAY GAY. I was so gay that at about 2 years old at my cousin’s wedding I threw a fit because I wanted a wedding dress like she had so my dad had to put me in one of his big t-shirts so I’d shut up. Someday if I can find pictures of it I’ll post them, I know I’ve seen them somewhere.

Anyway, when I was growing up I used to watch Roseanne all the time, it made me feel normal to see how abnormally they functioned I guess. During my parents fights, which they had very frequently I would pretend that we were the Conners because they seemed a lot happier.

WOW tragic, huh! Dear god that brick needs to go right back in the wall, f’real.

Still after like 20 years of watching the show the floor plan bugged me because I couldn’t figure it out. Everything made sense to me except the master bedroom/master bath configuration that never seemed to fit right with me. I’ve looked online several times for some kind of clue but I could never find a PDF or even a jpeg of the floor plan so it continued to haunt me.

Until three days ago. I spotted it while watching the show, the missing link in the house. The part I never understood was the doors actually, the doors they walk through to reach the bedroom or bathroom from the kitchen didn’t match the ones going from either room into the kitchen, they seemed switched. Three days ago however I noticed A HALLWAY. Yes that’s right.

WOOT.

I doubt many of you are as excited about this as I am but it ended a question that’s lingered in my head for a long time. I’m a simple guy that takes simple pleasures and this is one that has seemed to make my life a little more complete for some reason.

I have this blogging censor that keeps me from writing stuff that I don’t think anyone will give a shit about like Dan and Roseanne Conner’s Floor Plan but this time I said to myself “no, just go ahead and hit that ‘publish’ button. SOMEONE out there has to be wondering about the same thing so even if nobody else gets it, someone will.”

So here it is, the Conner Family’s Floor Plan.

The Roseanne Set

Yes, the set is still standing and alive and well. I got a comment on my facebook page from my friend Asa Benally that I met at the Seagle Colony in New York saying that the Roseanne set had also been used for the TV show Family Matters. Although I don’t personally see it, I did find out that the set has been modified and used for many other productions. Here is a picture of the set now, still at Lacy Studios that I found on Flikr.

So where did everybody go???

So according to the rumor mill Roseanne Barr is in talks with Fox to reprise Roseanne. OMG How cool would that be? She’s stated that if the Conner’s were around today, DJ would have died in Iraq and after Dan’s death and Roseanne’s depression they would have lost the house…

There are so many avenues she could take that though, in the last episode she revealed that the entire last season was made up and they had never actually won the lottery, but she was writing it in her memoir… so what happened with that? Did it get published? Did she loose the house, then make a ton of cash off her book and move to Chicago? What about Darlene? And Becky? Did she end up having a baby like they implied in the last episode? These are things I wonder about while laying in bed at night listening to Boards of Canada.

So in reality, where the eff is everybody now? What are the two Becky’s doing? What about DJ??? I took a minute to check up on everybody and see what’s going on. Here’s the skinny.

Dan – John Goodman is still alive and well. In 2009 he is expected to have completed 9 movies including the recent “Confessions of a Shopaholic”. Goodman also portrayed Pops Racer in the recent live action adaptation of Speed Racer.

Jackie – After Roseanne’s completion Laurie Metcalf went on to star in many Stage roles as well as a regular on the TV series circuit. She’s had roles on shows such as King of the Hill, Dharma and Greg, and Third rock from the sun. Every now and then she pops up as a guest star when I’m watching sitcoms and I say “Hi Jackie!”

DJ – No Kids, DJ isn’t gay. Michael Fishman disappeared from any kind of screen or stage, save a Larry King interview, an episode on Seinfeld and Walker, Texas Ranger and the movie AI. I finally spotted him on AI in the back seat of the car before they go to Rouge City. He’s now married and has a couple kids.

Becky I – Alicia Goranson, AKA Becky I pulled a DJ and more or less disappeared. She’s been in a few television roles such as Sex and the City and Fringe. Goranson now writes a blog entitled “Don’t Shoot the Messenger” at http://aliciagoranson.blogspot.com. I’m pretty sure that’s her at least. It’s comprised mostly of poetry, and it reads pretty well too.

Becky II – Most of us now know and love , AKA Becky II as Dr Elliot Reid on Scrubs. She’s mostly stayed on the TV circuit but has appeared in several movies as well. You can find her on myspace here: http://www.myspace.com/sarah_chalke

Mark Healy – Glenn Quinn was actually Irish and put on an American accent. He was a musician and collector of star wars memorabilia and partial owner of a club in North Hollywood, CA. After Roseanne he went on to portray Allen Doyle on Angel before he died in 2002 of a heroin overdose.

Kevin AKA David Healy – Johnny Galecki is still a working actor, most recently as Leonard Hofstadter on the TV series “The Big Bang Theory”. He too is on myspace, and lookin damn sexy if I do say so myself. http://www.myspace.com/johnnygalecki check him out!

Beverly Harris – Estelle Parsons is currently 81 years old and in 2008 took the role of Violet Weston in the play “August: Osage County”. She is also due to appear in the movie “Salomaybe?” in 2009. Parsons is still active and in good health.

And of course, Roseanne is still a major celebrity icon, she never seems to really go away. I would LOVE to see what she could do with an updated version of Roseanne, it seems to be so popular now anyway with fox bringing back shows like Absolutely Fabulous and Melrose Place. Even 90210 is back on the air, isn’t there room for Roseanne?

The REAL House of Conner – Pics of the real Roseanne House

Last week someone commented on my old WordPress site where I originally posted the Conner’s floor plan about the relation between the actual house and the set from the show. The comment read:

“The problem is the front door. It doesn’t fit the house layout. The door is on the right corner on the outside shots and on the inside shots the door is in the middle. >I was at the actual house today (no one lives there) and the floor plan inside the house is not the same as on the show. It’s not even close. The stairs in the real house are straight ahead as you walk into the house and the living room is to the left. I took pics. If you want them then send me an email.”

So I emailed Allen (the comment poster) and he gladly sent me the pictures of the front of the house as well as the Lobo, now a Pizza place and bar called “Talk of the Town”. Allen also said this about the interior:

“The inside is not the same layout on the show. The picture window is were the living room is and about 10 feet back is a wall parallel with the front of the house. To the right is another section that could be a second small living room but it is overshadowed by the stairs and then it looks like the kitchen is in the back.”

Unfortunately Allen couldn’t get any pictures of the interior because the house was vacant and dark inside but the shots he did get are pretty good. This is the house they used for all the exterior shots of the house in the cut scenes and such, enjoy!

Roseanne House pt 2

Today I discovered Google Sketch Up, and guess what I did with it.

Roseanne Conner

That’s right folks.  A 3D RENDER of the Conner Family’s floor plan.  Here’s the detailed floorplan and it’s correct as far as I’ve been able to tell from watching every single episode an hour a day every morning.  From here you can see the *secret* hallway behind the pantry in the kitchen.

Roseanne

Here’s the overview of the living room looking into the kitchen.  You can see the default Google man that looks surprisingly like little David Healy by Dan’s chair.  I even managed to find a textile pattern for their couch that’s eerilly similar to the actual set couch!

Conner Kitchen

Here we have the kitchen as seen from the door to the basement.

Conner Kitchen

Here’s the bathroom.  “Is this the sink am I shrinking?!?!”

Once I can figure out how to upload files onto wordpress I’ll upload the sketchup image so you can all play in it.

Dan and Roseanne Conner’s Floor Plan – updated

I guess from many of my posts you would think that I’m obsessed with Roseanne.  And yes, that may be a little bit true.  Roseanne is the one show that after several decades of being on television I can still sit down and watch no matter what time of day or season.

There’s one thing however that’s always bugged me about the show – the house’s floor plan.  Now I’m not an architect, engineer, draftsman or person of any real education concerning blue prints, etc but I’ve always been fascinated by floor plans.  When I was a kid my dad would draw house plans for people and I’d sit on the floor next to him and draw floor plans for the loft my Ken Doll and his boyfriend from North Korea that he met on the internet would move into when gay marriage was legalized…

Yeah as a kid I was totally gay.  GAY GAY GAY.  I was so gay that at about 2 years old at my cousin’s wedding I threw a fit because I wanted a wedding dress like she had so my dad had to put me in one of his big t-shirts so I’d shut up.  Someday if I can find pictures of it I’ll post them, I know I’ve seen them somewhere.

Anyway, when I was growing up I used to watch Roseanne all the time, it made me feel normal to see how abnormally they functioned I guess.  During my parents fights, which they had very frequently I would pretend that we were the Conners because they seemed a lot happier.

WOW tragic, huh!  Dear god that brick needs to go right back in the wall, f’real.

Still after like 20 years of watching the show the floor plan bugged me because I couldn’t figure it out.  Everything made sense to me except the master bedroom/master bath configuration that never seemed to fit right with me.  I’ve looked online several times for some kind of clue but I could never find a PDF or even a jpeg of the floor plan so it continued to haunt me.

Until three days ago.  I spotted it while watching the show, the missing link in the house.  The part I never understood was the doors actually, the doors they walk through to reach the bedroom or bathroom from the kitchen didn’t match the ones going from either room into the kitchen, they seemed switched.  Three days ago however I noticed A HALLWAY.  Yes that’s right.

WOOT.

I doubt many of you are as excited about this as I am but it ended a question that’s lingered in my head for a long time.  I’m a simple guy that takes simple pleasures and this is one that has seemed to make my life a little more complete for some reason.

I have this blogging censor that keeps me from writing stuff that I don’t think anyone will give a shit about like Dan and Roseanne Conner’s Floor Plan but this time I said to myself “no, just go ahead and hit that ‘publish’ button.  SOMEONE out there has to be wondering about the same thing so even if nobody else gets it, someone will.”

So here it is, the Conner Family’s Floor Plan.

Conner house 3-D render

MORE FROM THE FIRST FLOOR HERE!!!

ASK DUNDERBRAIN! Dumbass neighbors…

Dear DUNDERBRAIN!,

My neighbour has recently converted her attic into a bedroom, with a flat roof. In a seaside town. She now gets woken up by seagulls dancing on her roof and staring through her veluxe window. Apparently the seagulls are walking over from my chimney, where they (allegedly) roost. Do I cough up the money she wants from me to “seagull-proof” our roofs, or do I start throwing bread and fish onto her roof? Advice would be appreciated.

Sincerely,

Throwing Money to the Birds

Dear Dundercat,

OH you have one of THOSE neighbors, THOSE being people that do incredibly stupid things then blame it on someone else as to not look like a total idiot, in turn making them look like a total idiot.  In the US we have a show called Street Court that comes on during the same block as Jerry Springer, Steve Wilkos, and Maury Povich.  On street court they go to “the scene of the crime” and hold court, and more often than not it is a dispute relating to a home.  So many of the episodes surround people suing their slum lord because they’re broke bitches and can’t afford somewhere nice.

Like the other day this woman, weighing in at around 500lbs (about 226k) was suing her landlord because she had bed bugs.  Last time I checked we don’t even really get bed bugs in the states that bad but I might be wrong so that’s beside the point.  It couldn’t be the fact that she was hugely overweight and never cleaned her house, it couldn’t be that her physically capable son never cleaned the house, it definitely couldn’t be because her husband had just made a trip to Hungary and probably slept with a few hookers wile he was there, it was because the landlord didn’t take proper care of the property.

My point is if you rent a flat in a slum you see that it’s a slum when you rent it, the area didn’t just turn ghetto as soon as YOU moved in – and if it did that’s something you should look into yourself about.  It’s the same with your situation, Brighton didn’t just show up at the coast when this sea hag you have living next door decided to turn her attic into a bedroom, and seagulls didn’t just move inland when she did that either.  Really her contractor should have said “You realize what you’re in for here, don’t you?” but it’s a common sense issue.  You don’t expect your contractor to say “you know this water goes into the sewer, right?” when you have a new toilet put in.

As for what you should do I would see what the law says.  If for some reason you haven’t taken the necessary steps to “gull proof” your chimney then just do it, you don’t want the slag to sue you.  Otherwise if everything is on the up and up with your house then let it be.  Don’t shell out a single cent (or is it shilling over there?) to make up for her short sightedness.  And yes, throw bits of bread and fish out every chance you get.  She’ll convert it into a sewing room in no time.

the drama on farmville…

I have entirely too much time on my hands.

White Dog Turds…

Martin writes:

In the 1960s and 70s dog poo was white. Why?

Dear Martin,

When you first wrote this to me I thought you were putting me on.  Every day I take my dogs outside and when they do their business I take a plastic bag and pick it up and their ugly little turds are always brown, so of course I wrote back asking what the eff you were talking about for which you replied something starting with “Ah, perhaps you’re too young”.  Well turds are turds, I thought, they didn’t just invent brown turds when I came along in 1981.  Little did I know, I was horribly wrong.

Considering I live in the Güero Ghetto NOBODY cleans up after their dogs in my complex.  I’m constantly dodging little dried up turds and now that I think back on it they do turn a bit grey when they dry out.  It sparked my google sense so I started browsing and as it turns out dog food used to be a LOT crappier (teehee) than it is now.

Over the years dog food makers have stopped using bone meal in dog food replacing it with stuff that’s a little better for your dog (like cats).  Back in the 60’s and 70’s though the stuff was LOADED with it, increasing the raw calcium content of dog crap.  As the bile (digestive excrement giving poo it’s brown color) begins to dry the excrement it looses it’s brown color and the white from the undigested bone meal becomes more prominent.

Now dried up dog turds turn more of a grayish color depending on the quality of food they eat.  Also, you don’t see this as often because in more civilized areas of the world dog owners are expected to be responsible by cleaning up after their dogs.  Doggie sanitation stands can be found in nearly every park you go to now providing an easy solution to your dog crap problems.  If you ever want to see some come to my complex, they’re all around the sanitation stands.

Ask DUNDERBRAIN! oh no, religion…

Martin asks:

Are the views of the christian right christian?

Dear Martin,

WHOAH!  Easy – you’re getting Ask DUNDERBRAIN! started with a bang.  This is a big one to chew, ok – BREATHE – here we go…

A year ago I wrote a blog called “The Death of the Christian Right” right after Obama was elected.  Everyone had their own hopes for the new change being issued in with a president boasting change.  Now that I look back on it Obama was kinda like Santa to a lot of us.  Everyone had this idea of what his presidency would bring.  Some people just knew that it would mean the end of the ban on gay marriage.  Others thought it meant they wouldn’t be poor anymore.  Hell even some people believed it would be the end of the war on drugs.  Personally I was hoping for the end of the religious right.  Unfortunately as far as change goes, not much of it has happened that we as the public have been able to see besides the fact that we don’t have a self-rightious idiot in power anymore.  I mean really, knowing George Bush Jr was drunk behind the wheel of our country was enough to keep me in a nice solid depression.

Something I have discovered over the past year, this being the first year I’ve been an adult conscious of adult issues without an oppressive president in power, is that the religious right still has power even if they aren’t directly in power.  This happens all over the world and it goes far beyond Christianity, and in no part of the word does it seem to do any good.  Seriously, the religious right-ers are like the guy at the party that walks around telling everyone the dangers of drinking and smoking while trying to take the beers out of their hands and spray a fire extinguisher into their face to put out their cigarettes and feel they’re completely justified in doing so, like it’s their right to do so.  Then, when people finally get tired of it and kick their ass, they ball up on the floor screaming that they’re being prosecuted for being a christian.

In America the breakdown of religion goes like this:  About 78% Are Christian, about 50% being protestant and the other 25% being catholic.  Only about 1.7% are Jewish and a whopping .6% are Muslim.  .7% Are Buddhist and .4% are hindu, and another few percent making up the strange little religions like ECKANKAR and the Raelians.  The other 16% of us don’t really care.  We have better things to do with our time but this isn’t good enough for the majority.  Some people aren’t happy until absolutely everyone is the same and we’re this giant culture of borg-like entities.

So really the answer is no.  No, the views of the Christian right aren’t christian, they have nothing to do with Christianity.  They have everything to do with selfishness and power.  Christianity is a beautiful religion based on love and respect for your fellow man, not backing the power of a group of individuals.  Religion should be a way of life, a set of morals to live by not a method of oppressing any individuals or group of individuals.

UK's Favorite DUNDERBRAIN!s from 2009

Thanks Martin for sending in the UK’s favorite blogs from 2009!  You’re like the DUNDERBRAIN! correspondent for the UK.

#5 Why is SEX just not enough?

#4 Forces – Blind Freewriting

#3 Does This Not Skeeve Anyone Else Out?

#2 Sarah Pallin Makes Me Scared for America.

#1 Personal Issues, Religion, and Politics

Ask DUNDERBRAIN! What's up with Mickey and Minnie?

Chastity writes:

are mickey and minnie married? Cos minnie has her own house at disney land…why?

Dear Chastity,

No.  Mickey Mouse and Minnie are not married, not have they ever been.  There has never been an on-screen wedding or suggestion that there may one day be one.  Neither one wears a ring, and in my humble opinion Mickey is a little light in the loafers, if you know what I mean.  So with that being said, I have this suggestion for Minnie –

MOVE ON GIRL!

He’s obviously a homo and you’re wasting your time.  Seriously, who the hell dates the same guy for EIGHTY EFFING YEARS???  How often does our poor Minnie sit at home staring out her window hoping that one day Mickey will snap out of his “phase” and propose?  God knows Black Pete stopped barking up her tree half a century ago leaving no other suitors in her stable.

So what the ish is Disney’s deal?  Do they have no consideration for their characters who, for all practical purposes they have made real?  These are PEOPLE, anthropomorphic people that we have let into our homes for decades, can they not piss or get off the pot for any other reason than satisfying viewer curiosity?  Even though we see her from time to time as a Disney Channel icon something tells me that securing Minnie’s romantic future is somewhat of a back burner item for the people of Disney since all this Pixar crap starting coming around.

ASK DUNDERBRAIN! – Eggplant Parmesan and Labor…

Chastity Writes:

What is the deal with the eggplant parmesan and inducing labor? Is this real? Im gullable. But im willing to make this recipe soon!

Dear Chastity,

I did some reading up on this and although it’s an old wive’s tale many people have seen results from it.  In Cobb County Georgia, a restaurant called Scalini’s is known for their baby poppin’ Eggplant Parmesan.  In fact, their walls are decorated with over 300 pictures of babies said to have been assisted into this world via their hearty fried vegetable.

After a little prowling around I found that it wasn’t actually the dish itself but the basil and oregano in the marinara sauce.  I’m sure the fact that Eggplant Parmesan is an extremely heavy meal and after consuming there really isn’t much room left for a baby to hang out can’t have too much to do with it…

I also read that stimulating your nipples (gigggle gigggle) can help pop your kid out.  I know a lady that shoveled gravel until she went into labor.  Or just do it the old fashioned way and offer the kid $10 to bail.

Sarah Palin makes me scared for America…

This video scares the holy hell out of me.  Sarah Palin has written a book called “Going Rogue” and apparently it’s sweeping the conservative movement by storm.  Recently she was at a Borders bookstore in Columbus, Ohio and New Left Media was there conducting interviews with people waiting for a possible chance to meet their savior.

The part that really scares me is these idiots make up more of the population that we realize.  I don’t call them idiots because they’re conservative, my mother is conservative and although I don’t completely agree with her views on politics at LEASE she’s educated.  These poor saps have been brainwashed by their upbringing, social environment, and Fox News.

The problem is they’re completely ignorant to the issues they’re standing by, they’re supporting her for no other reason than she’s an ultra-conservative republican.  Their friends support her, their family support her, and they fallow with the flock like the rest of the sheep.

The scariest part is she has a HUGE constituency in the republican party, she actually has a change at a 2012 presidential nomination.  Although I’d love to see Tina Fey on SNL again (the ONLY way I’d willingly watch that god awful show) I would be scared to see an America run by this slag.

There are enough idiots in this country to possibly get her elected if she runs on her own ticket.  She has charisma, and with a lot of people in this media driven country charisma is all it takes.  So many people can be won over by a pretty face and fast speech, I mean look what happened to this country nearly 10 years ago, we elected a man that we all wanted to have a beer with and he turned out to be a drunk.  Sure, Palin may not be a drunk but there are many things in this world more dangerous than alcoholism.

Here’s the video, I think it speaks more than anything I could ever say.

Some say angry, I call it "passionate"

It’s been brought to my attention that I come across as angry in a lot of my posts.  I mean when I say things like ” It’s like listening to a dog getting it’s anal glands espressed while playing Sonic the Hedgehog with the volume full blast.” in reference to Dam-A Ambert-La’s (I say it like that so I don’t give him any google power) new album, or that I want to “hold his head under water until the bubbles stop” I’m not really ANGRY per say, I’m just very passionate about my subject matter.

I don’t hate Dam-A Ambert-La out of anger, I hate him out of passion for good music.  Which he does not produce.  And when I bite little girl’s heads off in the movie theater I don’t do it out of anger, I do it out of passionately disliking rude children.

Whenever I write things like ” What kind of selfish son of a bitch would make other people late because they want to be comfortable?” about people driving slow in the passing lane, I’m not ANGRY, I’m just passionate about driving, and being respectful on the road.  I mean is it too much to ask that people are courteous on the road?  Is it too much to ask that people use the information given to them in defensive driving class?  Is it too much to ask that people STOP being a douchebag for the few minutes they’re driving on the road, considering it is a large piece of heavy machinery that they are operating and they CAN in fact kill people?

Do you not agree when I say “In my humble opinion if you just went out and bought your tween daughter her CD you should take that and the booty shorts you bought her back to wal-mart, then voluntarilly drop your kids off with Child Protective Services so they can at least HOPE to achieve hookerhood the right way.”?  Is that so far off base?  Do you seriously think it’s ok to exploit a 16 year old girl, potentially ruining her sense of self esteem when she eventually balloons out to twice her current size as most women from her neck of the woods do?  I mean seriously, she won’t always look that good, I mean her hips are already thick, it won’t be long before they look like a curdled tub of cottage cheese.

But seriously, I’m REALLY not that angry of a person.  I guess stuff gets lost in translation.  Sometimes people take me a bit too seriously – and I could make an active effort to be more appealing, happier, write shiny public friendly material but if I did that I wouldn’t be the DUNDERBRAIN! would I?  This has inspired me more for DUNDERBRAIN2010.  In D2010 nothing will be held back, nothing is sacred.  I’ll be adding new content such as ASK DUNDERBRAIN!, a special section where I answer all your lovely questions about anything and everything.  I invite everyone to write in with your topics, suggestions, and concerns.  This year I’m giving DUNDERBRAIN!  to the readers.