Archive for the ‘new star trek’ Category


March 7, 2009


Go check out the new Star Trek trailer, like, NOW.

Go ‘head child, go look. I’ll be waiting here when you’re done to discuss.

OK, now that you’ve seen it, WASN’T THAT SO FREAKIN COOL! Finally, a trailer that gives a little clue to the plot of JJ Abrams’ take on the quintessential science fiction story of all time.

So many rumors have now been either confirmed or combined. The trailer starts out with someone trying to recruit Captain Kirk into Star Fleet, daring him to do better than his father had done before him. Apparently he does.

The funniest part of the trailer – Why is it that Captain Kirk is always getting the captain’s chair on accident or faudulent means? Lets examine, starting with the movies.

The Motion Picture. Admiral Kirk is giving a good inspection to the refitted Enterprise. On the tour he decides “you know, I think I want to be the captain instead” and screws everything up.

The Wrath of Khan. The Crew starts out, Spock in charge. Kirk decides that he’d rather run things so Spock rolls for him and gives up the captain’s chair. The rest of the movie is filled with failed guilt trip attempts from Spock, then in a final attempt to guilt Kirk, spock dies.

The Search For Spock. Kirk feels bad so this time he STEALS the excelsior and goes to hunt down his best buddy. In the process Christopher Lloyd shows up and blows up all the ships, but then Kirk steals HIS ship and takes off with it.

The Journey Home. The whole movie takes place in a stolen ship. Nuff said. Then the crew all back together with a slightly disoriented and disturbed spock go back in time to steal whales.

The Final Frontier. The first Star Trek movie where Kirk is the actual captain of the Enterprise from start to finish, but this time Spock’s brother steals the enterprise from HIM! That’s right, someone pulls a Kirk on Kirk. Then when Kirk gets control of his ship again, he tells god to go suck a dick and starts all kinds of trouble.

The Undiscovered Country. Again Kirk is the Captain, this time for the last time – but he gets thrown in Klingon prison. Spock picks him up and they go blow the top off a Star Fleet conspiracy.

AND FINALLY -Generations. At the very beginning of the movie the Enterprise captain SUCKS so Kirk gets all antsy until they let him drive. After that he gets killed by a space wave and then, his captaining days are over.

NOW – YEARS LATER – And before any of this other stuff happened, it looks like Kirk with get the ship passed on to him like a cheap hooker yet again. Needless to say I’m about to wet myself I’m so excited about this movie. I literally haven’t been this Jazzed up since Matrix Revolutions.